When asked about play therapy, one of the common questions we hear is, “Why do I have to pay a therapist to play with my child? Can’t I just play with them at home for free?” This is an excellent question. The play therapy that takes place in the therapy office is not the same as playing with your child at home. When a child client is brought into our practice who has experienced an adverse life event, we almost always use client-centered play therapy as the first therapeutic intervention. There are three main reasons why play therapy is so helpful for children.

First, the basic premise to understanding play therapy is understanding the concept of play as being a natural language for children. Think back to your childhood. Did someone teach you how to play tag, hide-and-seek, or play in the sand? I know for me. Did you sit down with your son or daughter and teach them how to play with stuffed animals trucks or how to play tea time? Of course not. It all comes naturally to children. The natural language of the play is not specific to any one culture, race, social-economic status, gender, or faith. Children worldwide use play to help them express their emotions. Play therapy understands this concept and utilizes this natural language to children to facilitate healing. When we have a 6-year-old in our office who is struggling with understanding how to live life as a Type-I Diabetic and the limitations that come with that, we don’t have them sit on the couch and talk about it. We allow him to use toys and to express the internal conflicts and emotions he might be feeling.

Second, play therapy creates a safe environment for the child to explore their internal state of being. Play therapy allows for a safe space for the child to explore and communicate their internal emotions. Play therapy is typically voluntary, enjoyable, and non-threatening. For example, if a child experienced a sexual assault, their play might be sexualized. In the session, I would never tell a child, “You can’t play like that” or “don’t do that. That’s not good.”

Third, play therapy facilitates teaching and learning. There are three main interventions that therapists use to facilitate teaching and learning.

1. Tracking: We observe and comment on your child’s actions without judgment or direction. This approach helps them feel seen and understood.

2. Reflection: We reflect or paraphrase what your child expresses to help them name their emotions. They might be feeling out of control and angry but do not know what those feelings are called. We help put names to these emotions, validating their experiences.

3. Limit Setting: When a child has experienced a traumatic event, their sense of boundaries might be skewed. Setting limits in play therapy helps them learn how to set and respect boundaries, an essential part of feeling safe and secure again.

Lastly, the limit setting allows for teaching boundaries as being a vital part of feeling safe. When a child experiences an adverse live event, there is a high likelihood that some type of boundary was violated. Setting limits in play therapy models to the child how they can set their own boundaries and rebuild ones that were broken.

Children are naturally resilient, and play is their universal language. We tap into that resilience through child-centered play therapy to help them heal from difficult experiences. There are no limits to a child’s imagination, and we use that boundless creativity to facilitate healing.